How to forgive and find closure if the other is unwilling, absent or dead

empty chairDomino still has issues with her father than bleed over into her relationships now with men (surprise!).  She asked me how she could do Forgiveness Work on him when he’s been dead for many years.  I told her it doesn’t matter if someone is alive or dead, where the issue lives is in our consciousness, and we are the ones who control our perceptions there.  My process is this and it’s pretty standard.

  1. Place a chair across from you. In your mind’s eye, imagine sitting across from you anyone with whom you do not feel total alignment or support.
  2. Imagine an infinite source of Love and healing flowing into the top of your head (from your Higher Self or the Creator/God/whatever of your understanding), and let the source of love and healing flow down inside your body, fill up the body, and overflow out your heart to heal the person in the chair before you.
  3. Have a discussion with the person.  Tell them anything you want them to know.  Remember they did the best they could under the conditions at that time.  You don’t know what struggles they were going through.  Imagine them responding to you as you would like to be responded to and understood.
  4. Forgive them.  Tell them you’re sorry for your part in whatever happened, and ask them to forgive you.  Thank them for their part in your life.  Tell them you love them and mean it. “I love you, I’m sorry, please forgive me, I forgive you, thank you.”
  5. Imagine standing up with the person before you.  With a hand swipe motion, cut the cords between you.  All past issues are now dissolved.  Imagine the person walking away as you feel love and forgiveness for them.

Related: Hawaiian Forgiveness Ho’oponopono Process 

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How to forgive and find closure if the other is unwilling, absent or dead  
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