The candy that was the big goal and focus all month now lies strewn on the table and everyone is sick from it.  I’ve done that with so many things in my life, strived for a particular goal because everyone else did, then got sick of it because I wanted it to make me happy and it didn’t. But it’s a process of elimination and every year I learn more.

A friend asked, “how do we stay focused on one thing at a time?” For me, I decide what to focus on, then I make myself cultivate an intense interest in it. So when I send a thought or a prayer out about it, I am focused ON IT, I am not focused on “the house is a mess and the kid won’t study and my husband isn’t speaking to me and the news is scary.” Just as you’re not using your segment of focus time to focus on, say, bowling, just the same, during this segment of focus time, you’re only thinking about your goal. Every other thought can wait. And the trick is that when you make those thoughts wait, you stop giving them regular attention and they fade away. Break the cycle of giving them regular attention.  If we knew how powerful our thoughts truly are, we would spend so little time on nonsense. We’d be so busy staying happy that we wouldn’t get involved in anyone else’s business and there’d be no conflict. It’s true. The only reason we don’t change water into wine or heal cancer with one touch is because our thoughts are scattered all over the place.  And now we will begin to schedule deliberate segments of time to focus on a goal.  Even if it’s just 15 solid minutes. Your life starts… Now.

Trungpa Rinpoche notes, “Our lives awaken through ordinary magic.” It’s in everyday things that the miraculous happens. If we practice being here now, we develop the sensitivity to perceive and appreciate the daily miracles of our lives. Ram Dass

I was once irked that an ‘interloper’ had appeared out of nowhere and brought drama into my neighborhood. I knew I’d attracted it. I knew there was a reason I had to have it literally right in my face. I also knew that the longer it irked me, the longer it’d be there.  I know that if I want to be free of a situation, I must first learn the lesson from it, and I must love it as it is.  As soon as I remembered that, I went on a bomb-with-love campaign. I meditated on the feeling of love, that we all seek love and connection and we feel joy when we find it. I blessed the situation and all of us. I did that as a daily practice as I did my daily healing bench sessions. Then I eventually stopped thinking about it. The second I released resistance, they moved.

Learn the alchemy true human beings know. The moment you accept what troubles you’ve been given, the door will open –Rumi

Yay, free of my cold, I can breathe and feel like I have a new lease on life.  I spent most of the day compiling third quarter financials for my tax chick and drove them in to her about 5pm.  As I arrived home, I noticed that although I’d dug up and given away a dozen 6-feet tall loquat saplings in the last two months, I saw three more that could go.  Earlier this year, I’d gone on a planting spree, and hadn’t expected all of the saplings to survive.  Although I weeded out every other tree in the line, I noticed today there were three more being crowded. I dug them up and placed them in pots at the mailbox for a friend. I smiled to see what a wall I had growing: a hedge of turk’s cap, eleagnus and bamboo. With the line of loquat trees, it was beginning to look like a fortress and began to feel confining. The last few months I’d been disassembling bamboo fences to open the views up again.  My yard is pretty well hidden from street traffic. I like to have sitting areas where I see no other houses, only trees and bushes and gardens and woods and the scampering critters. It’s a daily healing for me, sitting in nature. Continue reading →

I’m getting over a cold and every day my head is getting a little more clear. I’ve also been releasing old programming during this Mercury retrograde and feeling layers of emotional weight drop.  I am feeling free and clear. The thing about feeling free and clear is that it’s easy when you’re clear to review the past objectively and learn from it. I’d been living in my small contained world, happily isolated for many years.  I  attracted a situation which tested my ability to maintain composure under pressure. It showed me who I am when I feel pushed to the limit and I learned a lot by studying my emotions and reactions. At the time, I’d had several clients going through the same scenario in their life and I’d asked  “how does someone get in a situation like *X* and not realize it? Why is it such a surprise upon realization?” The Universe answered for me in a way that threw me into their scenario and let me learn from it firsthand. Ah, I see. I now have greater compassion and understanding that I could not have book-learned. Instant upgrade!

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It’s been a week of buying lots of fresh vegetables to make healthy meals and snacks, especially soups now that the weather is cooling down.  I like soup combinations like red pepper and winter squash with  sweet potato and kale, or winter squash with plaintain, zucchini and chickpeas. Today at the market I scored fresh celery, Rome apples, parsley, an almost ripe plaintain, 2 giant red peppers, 2 zucchini, 2 yellow summer squash, a fat eggplant, 2 limes and 3 lemons.  I’ll be roasting the veggies to use atop salads, rice, potatoes, in burritos, mashed into dips for pita points and tortilla chips.  Oh, and broccoli to make my fave Asian Spiced Lowfat Broccoli Salad.  Simple fresh foods can be such a feast when we appreciate them.

I just mowed my neighbor’s yard, since I share the view. It’s been 3 months since it was last mowed. When I saw the Code Compliance truck driving by, I thought, heck, let me just do it for her right now.   It took all of 30 minutes. Now the yard is done and may not need it again until March.  I figured she could use a break, it’s been a hectic year and she’s had no help at home. Then I remembered it’s her birthday, so to honor her solar return and in the name of fresh new beginnings, I chanted a cleansing prayer and a blessing around the property as I mowed, to clear old energy and make way for the new.  Blessed be, indeed. You’re welcome.  It’s my honor, for rizzle.

Heavenly Father/Mother God, thank you for whatever I did to deserve the good You’ve blessed me with in this lifetime.  I have no regrets whatsoever.  If I died this moment, it would have all been worth it. I love and am loved.