Susan Krauss

Standing outside a building looking in (really looking down into as if from a high window) and Suzie Miller is kind of writhing around on a small bed like she is having a seizure. Reminds me of what it must have looked like to her when she was in the ER with me that last time before they could give me the pain shot. Susan Krauss who was a social activist in Brevard. (Susan was discovered murdered in her apartment on Wednesday, December 28, 1988. Krauss was last seen the previous evening shopping alone at the Albertson’s grocery store in Indian Harbor Beach. Krauss lived by herself at The Hamptons Apartments located at 3040 South Highway A1A, Melbourne Beach. She was at the time of her death was 54 years of age and extremely involved in community activities. Police report reads, “The body of the victim was discovered inside the apartment. The victim’s apartment was located in south Melbourne Beach, which at the time of the murder, was not heavily populated. The investigation into the murder has revealed that an unidentified person entered or was invited into the residence, after which they killed Mrs. Krause. It was determined that the victim died as the result of having been shot.) Anyway, Susan was suddenly with me at the window. She directs my attention to a man on the sidewalk below, wearing a long dark overcoat and standing near a tree and glancing around. It is a regular city street lined with like oak trees maybe the height of a one or 2 story building. We are up maybe 4 stories. He’s not looking at us. I wonder why Susan is at the window with me and wonder why she isn’t telling me info about her assailant instead. She tells me ”it doesn’t matter any more, he was killed a few years after anyway. Forgive them for they know not that they know not.”

end of dream

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I’m at a large, new apartment complex and I have just moved there.  Susan Rizzo and some of the Summertown, TN Farm gang live there too and there is a gathering event going on, we are all out in the big back patio area for a meal.  It looks like the patio/bar/pool area of a typical hotel resort, but no pool and it is groomed by nature rather than being manicured.  Not run down looking, just the foliage not tended to, a lot of grass growing in the sidewalks and patios although they don’t seem cracked for the grass to grow thru.  Looks like it was supposed to be that way.   I pick up a plate, which is really a large wood and maybe stainless steel platter, almost a shallow bowl, and I put a chapati on it to save my place at table.  I tear my chaptati in 3 parts and take a bite so someone knows the plate belongs to someone.   I go thru the food line but all that is available is meats or foods I don’t care to eat, thinking they have no nutritional value so why waste the calories if I don’t even want it.  I see my plate and chapaties have been taken by someone but I don’t know who, it is just missing, and I say nothing.   I decide not to eat, it’s only $5 but there’s nothing I can eat except the chaptati I took a bite of, and someone has taken my plate and my place at table anyway.  Continue reading →

I have been reading some Seth and talking with galpal Sally Carmany about Seth and dreams, so I’ve been asking to remember dreams at night and am writing them down. I slept most of the night, off and on until 6:20am, on the couch and wanted to have a few hours in my bed for more dream opportunities and to do some visualization.   Here’s the dream I had:  I’m in the halls of a big, big office building. Looking for where the bathrooms are located on the floor.  One office has lot of equipment piled up outside and I get the impression they are letting a lot people go and this might be their last day. I don’t want to disturb them by asking at their door, and just then the door opens. Out come 2 women, one walking carrying boxes and the other in a very large and tall wheelchair, way high off the floor so she is maybe a foot taller than me. But as I get closer, I see we’re about eye level. They are just going across the hall to another office and I see they have the door (not needing my help with it) so I continue on down the hall.    Continue reading →

When I went to Chili’s today, they did not have the Caribbean salad I usually get and I almost left but the server said she’d ask if they could make it for me, with all my substitutions (chicken for salmon; romaine for iceberg) and they could and it came back salmon was raw in the center, I ordered a cup of chicken noodle soup that was tasteless yet so peppery I could not eat it, plus the floor in the ladies room was so slippery I reported it, and thought they are lucky it was me going in there with rubber soled shoes and not some elderly or disabled person who would fall. I did their online survey and told them of my experience. Interesting because I was in a good mood and never have any complaints at a restaurant.

I’m in a very large hotel resort type place and am sharing a room with Ma Yoga Shakti.  We are with a group and they all begin to go down to breakfast and I want to rush back to the room to brush my teeth first.  I can’t find the room and can’t even find the right door to go in to find the rooms, so am asking staff and strangers as I wander thru the large, filled dining room and then empty hallways.   I had spent so much time focusing on the other people in the group we were all with that I didn’t notice where we were going, so I didn’t know how to get back.  It’s a big hotel and Bill Gates is there with another group and he begins talking to me.  I  notice I am wearing mismatched pajamas and look sloppy while everyone else is dressed up.  He acts like we know each other and he acts like I am not dressed oddly.   I am wandering thru the hallways lookng for the right door to the entrance to our corridor, or for something that looks familiar to let me know where I am.   Continue reading →

I got an email from a diabetic friend telling me he had an open cut on his foot healing up and his mother was visiting in town and wanted him to take her out and about, even thought she knew about the foot. I replied:   You HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING saying your mother wants you to take her out entertaining when you should be home with your leg up.  She does not get it.  Ok, I will say this once, and I know you already know this.  I’m just Spirit’s personal reminder that the world needs the work you have to give.  And you need an able body/vehicle to do all it all, and it will fulfill your every dream.  YOU are a diabetic.  YOU are obese.  If you make your food become your medicine, you can control the diabetes, despite extra weight.  The incorrect food will create toxins that your body can no longer process.  It can no longer process them due to the diabetes.  When the toxins build up, it appears in your legs.  You are a diabetic.  I know a lot of diabetics.  You have to be careful of your feet anyway.  You should be wearing diabetic shoes and they need to lace up.  I’m not saying anything you don’t know.  Continue reading →

I’m in a home like a cabin in the everglades and visiting friends like Doug and Trish although I don’t think it’s them. I have a man with me, the cabin is in the middle of the woods and we are walking through taking a look at the setup of the rooms. I hear a bunch of kids in the distance getting closer and wonder if school is out and then wonder why they are so close to here and if they are going to break in when it’s closed down. The Trish person talks to them though as if she knows them and they don’t stay for long. It’s raining and I go to the “front door” to make sure it’s closed and the door is simply a screen that you pull across the tree branches and it doesn’t quite fit and I think the mosquitoes must come in, although I don’t see or feel any of them. Izzy is sitting just inside the front door.
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end of dream

In real life, I went to bed about 9pm as it began to rain hard here, opened the garage door and let YinYang in but Izzy was nowhere to be found – I know he doesn’t like storms.  Continue reading →

I stood with an elderly woman who asked me to help stop a fight between her kids, “they won’t stop fighting, he doesn’t mean it.” But then we were in her home and they weren’t people but dogs and then she was on the floor and standing with me also. She didn’t know she was dead looking at herself. She had blood on her but not sure from what. I wondered if we should tidy up a bit before her son got off work.

It’s been hectic here, another friend passed, that makes 3 in 5 weeks, memorial service at Unity Sunday for Curt who passed Tuesday, took New Kitty in to be put down today, won the Cash 3 three times for $40 each on tickets I had forgotten to check, new beginnings, clearing up old karma, just the business of life as usual, Redid my own will since Dan who passed in May was my PR.  Tired enough to sleep a week straight, hoping to go to tomorrow night drumming class.

I need to take New Kitty to be put down.  I can tell he is a very old kitty and he requires a lot of attention.  When I am just sitting, he wants to sit all over me and when I am sleeping he is walking on me and getting his face right in my face.  Then he does the patty paw thing and slobbers. He eats ok, he knows to go out by himself and to come back in, the cats are tolerating him, he sleeps most of the time on the chair in the living room.  He sneezes which makes me think he may have a respiratory bug that I don’t want anyone else to catch.  Mostly though he is a many-times-daily-reminder of Danny Gaude, a longtime friend I’ve known since I was a kid, who passed May 19th.  He was the closest thing to a brother I had until my own brother reappeared suddenly after 37 years in 2003.  I feel the loss acutely and the cat is a reminder.  I have asked several friends if they would like him, but each wants a younger cat to grow up with, and I don’t blame them.   I am conflicted and my heart is heavy.