It might be easy to say a friend doesn’t care to make amends if it involves any soul searching on their part. But that would be a limited, egoic mind’s perception of it.  We all process things differently.  The immediate response of someone with no emotional vocabulary will be different than someone who is used to talking everything out.  One may feel cornered and initially respond like a trapped animal. And they ARE trapped, trapped in past programming of maybe as a kid being interrogated and in trouble, who knows. You may think you are asking a casual question. They may take it as a verbal attack. They may respond in anger.  That is just the egomind/personality feeling it must defend from the overshadowing of the soul. It will pass. It’s been asked an important question and it would like to know the answer itself. Give it time for thought.  The personality wants the soul to unfold. It is just unfamiliar ground, so the first steps are shaky and uncertain. The beaten dog can bite the kindest hand. Don’t take score too soon.  Don’t take score. Let the soul unfold itself and keep the question in motion. Give the answer time to brew and there will be joy in the sharing of it.

RELATED:  When they insist on holding a grudge

Two friends are discussing an incident of a year ago. They have very different recollections of it. One is relying on memory, one has a written record. Both believe their version to be true. What one experienced was not what the other experienced.  Since they never discussed it, they did not know that until a year later.  It’s important to remember in any encounter that what one experiences is not necessarily what the other experiences.  If we’re in the presence of something we are not a vibrational match to, we can miss it completely even if it is right in front of our face. This is why, in court, circumstantial evidence is far more accurate than eyewitness testimony.  According to a recent study, your memories are changed by the act of recalling them, meaning that every memory we have is colored by the times we’ve recollected it before.The research shows that recalling a memory more often makes that memory less accurate, and that every time you take a memory off the shelf in your brain, you put it back just a tiny bit different.  That’s because instead of remembering the actual memory, you’re recalling the memory of the last time you remembered it and any mistakes that might have been introduced there. Like a game of human telephone, those mistakes can build on one another over time, leaving out details and introducing mistakes.

From Brain Distorts Memories Every Time It Recalls Them

When I see someone doing far less than I know they are capable of, and far less happy than I know they can be, I can’t help but want more for them. But if I continue to hold that thought, I’m not entertaining the notion they may be growing or benefiting in ways I can’t even imagine. After all, it’s none of my freaken business anyway and I’ve gotta get the log out of my own eye first.

If so, that might mean it’s time to let it age for another year.

Even though it’s deadline week for the magazine, I’ve been spending time working in my yard. I love it. I mowed the back lawn yesterday and the front today.  This weekend, I’d redesigned my garage so the trash bins would be kept outside. That meant moving the entrance to the east garden path about four feet south, which I did. I lined the new path with six spider plants which I repotted with more dirt and mulch.  I dug up a bunch of philodendron to widen the path. I watered everything under the canopy, all around the property. I like that I can walk all around my yard almost completely under the shade of tall oaks and pines. I tend to look at my yard in sections, as I work in it, rather than as a whole. I seldom just walk outside to bask in the beauty of it. I’m usually on my way to work on something and stay focused on that. This week I’ve been seeing my yard with new eyes. It once again looks like a nice, big park with its trails and sitting areas. It feels relaxing to just walk around out there, without a chore in mind. And when I’m in that state of mind that there’s nothing to do except to enjoy what is right in front of me, that’s heaven.

Bless the players. Honor the process. This will only make you wiser.

Another morning of waking up with a project on my mind!  The wind and rains this week finally did in the bamboo and palmetto frond wall I’d woven to line my driveway.  I knocked it down yesterday and awoke this morning ready to redo that space. I salvaged the bamboo poles that were still good and took the rest to the street. I’d let the grass and ivy grow over the edges of the driveway, so I took my shovel and edged it all.  I got the rake and raked everything off the driveway and into the east yard.  Taking down the wall opened a view from the street into the east garden, so I fashioned a quick stand of cut bamboo for privacy. I created a new seating area across from it. It’s an entirety new look. Continue reading →

I did a massive cleaning/clearing project last week!  It was motivated by a couple of feng shui questions. I’d wondered if I needed a remedy for the iron security bars on my windows and sliding glass doors.  (Yeah, I’m from Miami.)  I learned the remedy is what I’d already done: soften the inside with window treatments, and the outside with bird feeders and tall plants that move in the wind.  I also wondered how might I lay out my feng shui bagua if I have an integral garage? I have a built in two car garage, so it is in the No. 6 Helpful friends, Travel and Guides sector. I read that entering through a messy utility space “can lead to issues such as always putting other people’s needs before your own.” I had an awakening in that moment. I went out to the garage, which I’d last cleaned in 2011. I could get to everything, but it was in much disarray.  I’d slowly let it become a real mess, and I walked past my garbage bins, pest control, tools every time I came in the house.  Enough! I moved the car out and took photos of the garage, my “before” photos. The next morning, I began moving everything out of the garage and onto the driveway. That’s the fastest way for me to organize — clear and clean the room, then decide what goes back in there.
Continue reading →

It went by in a whirlwind, but I’ve definitely been in the flow the last two days. I delivered the May magazine to Cassadaga and Melbourne and had a dozen appointments and errands.  Everywhere I went, it was like clockwork. At Home Depot, I bought a new ceiling  fan since mine stopped working last week, and I also purchased a new shower arm and head.  (Mine had a leak and –> I wrote about it here.) I went home and was surprised it took only a few minutes to replace the shower fixture.  I cleaned up the broken passenger side mirror of my Prius. In just one morning, I attended to a half dozen projects I’d not made time for in months! After watching YouTube videos on replacing the ceiling fan, I scheduled a pal to replace it. The bf kept saying “maybe it’s a connection.” He yanked the pull cord several times quickly tonight — “See?” I said, “I told ya it wasn’t working.”  I told him I was going to open the new fan box and put the blades together. He told me to not open the box yet. He’s very psychic. An hour later I walked into the bedroom and the fan is going!  I know the reason the fan began working again is that I’d cleaned up the stagnant energy around the home repairs.   I’ve had a hole in my shower wall for a month.  It’s been easy to ignore as I shower in the guest bath. The car mirror has needed replacing for over a year.  It’s easy to ignore since I don’t see the duct tape patch when I’m in the car. That’s how I ease into stagnation. Taking my repair list and simply beginning the repairs freed up the energy, and everything began flowing better. And my ceiling fan began working on its own!