I’ve counseled with a lot of people through the years and I get to hear everyone’s story of why they think they are unable to attract a partner.  Most of them think it has to do with their looks and they spend their time focused on that.  I know several women who would be considered plain or even unattractive by many people, but they are always dating someone and don’t have a problem getting attention.  After getting to know them, I realize the common thread is they are all very confident and interesting to talk to. While most women would be complaining about their looks and their life, they were talking about the lessons they’d learned in life and the exciting plans they have for the future.  That makes all the difference in with their ability to hold someone’s interest despite their looks.