The topic of advice queries this week seems to be “let’s give the boyfriend/husband an ultimatum — it’s me or work.” Whether you’re together 5 years or 50, let each partner spend time doing what gives them the most fulfillment. Don’t pout if they don’t choose you, even on so-called holidays. That doesn’t mean they don’t care. They’re just loving their work or hobby so much all else fades into the background. Find something for yourself that does the same for you.