A married boyfriend proposes: is it a red flag he has so many loose ends from the past and has no one to help him but her?

Domino isn’t sure if she should be flattered or wary as her new boyfriend proposed on their one month anniversary.  It’s new love, she wants happiness, but is also careful who she involves with her kids.  Infatuated as they are right now, she knows he has a wife and child he left a year ago.  He has much unfinished business with them — emotional, legal, financial — before they even talk divorce.  His daughter and wife read about his romance on his Facebook page and asked him to please cool it while they are still married. He doesn’t seem to care they found it hurtful.  Domino doesn’t know the truth of his past, so she doesn’t judge. He left his last 3 relationships (after leaving wife) not on good terms. She’s not sure who or what to believe. All she knows is what she feels.  She feels led to follow her heart, and believe him. I told her the fact they have such chemistry and rapport is the Universe’s way of letting them know they have karmic work. They will be together as long as they are in vibrational resonance. As in dancing, let the stronger one lead.  

But just because something feels familiar and comfortable doesn’t mean it’s good for you. When people go from one abusive relationship to another, it’s because that is what feels normal, it’s what feels familiar. Being able to adjust to an abnormal situation isn’t always healthy.  Only she can decide if the overall situation leaves her with a feeling of forward motion, needing more info or holding her back. Until she gathers the info she needs, I told her to use the thoughts of their good times and loving feelings as fuel for her creative visualization. That will help attract resolution, and answer for her how does a man get himself to a place in life where he has no friends, no means of income and no one to count on except her?

It feels” all good” as it always does in the beginning, all very “us against the world, no one else gets US but US.”  It has all fallen into place so synchronistically that it feels like fate or karma while it is always and only about vibrational matching. She’s the only one who chooses what to give priority and focus to. She’ll make the choice from the perspective she holds, with the info she’s been given, and the understanding she’s gleaned. And as always, it will be a vibrational match to where she is.  I shared on Facebook and got the following relevant insights:

BC remarked: I guess my best council on this …is 2 thoughts. If they’ll do it with you, they’ll do it to you. History not examined and learned from is bound to repeat itself. If she’s willing to live with the consequences, well then have at it. This may be NEW love for her, but seems like business as usual for him. Just sayin.

ADC commented: I have been in a similar situation, and after the shiny new wears off, she will be realize that once a cheater, always a cheater. Never do anything irreparable within a year of starting a new relationship, or ending an old one.

TLM wrote: Ok RED flags BIG time but more for “Domino” for thinking so little of herself as to date a married man. If he’s cheating on her he’ll cheat on you and without trust the relationship is DOOMED!

BC again: Maybe the Lover is a Narcisisist? Sounds Classic. Me Me ME. No concern, for the wife , child, partner. What about ME? A Course In Miracles talks about the difference between Specialness. and being Uniqueness… It says: “We are all Unique, like a snowflake… not special.” But to the narcisist, They are SPECIAL. Of course Special people have special needs. Needs like no one else….and WE dumbasses…just don’t understand. If you know one, to yourself say “I SEE YOU” and do your best not to feed the beast. Smile and nod… smile and nod. “)

 

Leave a Reply