I just watched a show about teens with social anxiety: they don’t want to go in public as they think everyone is looking at them and judging them, or that everyone is talking about them behind their back.  Whether it’s youth or just lack of life experience, what they don’t realize is that nearly everyone feels that way.  They also don’t realize that everyone is so stuck in their own little thought bubble of self absorption and fear, that they’re not looking at YOU anyway, they are staring down at their toes the same as you are, avoiding eye contact for dear life.  God forbid we actually look at each other and acknowledge each other.  I counsel with so many people the past 20+ years that I see patterns in behavior that others don’t get to see.  I average maybe 50 people each month with an hour to tell me about their most important concern.  When I hear 5 or 10 people having similar detailed experiences, I begin to see the pattern.  And I see a lot of patterns in behavior.  It’s one reason I’m good at my job: if I can experience enough of something that it enables me to see patterns within it, that allows me to see the bigger picture.  The bigger picture here is that maybe 90% of us have social anxiety and we all think we’re the only one.  So instead of spending valuable time head tripping over what someone else is thinking, try instead to get out in public, smile and make eye contact, help others feel at ease.  Life is too short to waste it stuck within our four walls alone and unfulfilled.  It’s not always about you.  Try letting it be about someone else for a change.

Sessions with Andrea