I had an interesting dream last night.  I’ve had a head cold this weekend and been pretty fuzzy from Benadryl and sleeping a lot.  I turned on the tv just as the movie Shutter Island came on. I am not sure how much I slept through or might have heard unconsciously as it was on, as I was also scrolling through Facebook and half the time the sound was muted.  If some of my dream scenes are from the movie, I’m unaware of it. I turned it off 10 minutes before the ending.  In the dream, I am walking in a large building, like a huge old manor house.  I’m aware that it’s the middle of the night and “after hours.”  I’m walking through the service hallways, and every so often I encounter a service person walking past on their nightly duties.  It begins to be apparent to me that every one I see has a physical deformity, and some are quite grotesque. I think, “how cool they have employed so many that may be unable to get employed otherwise.”    Continue reading →

… Holding the vision…

Part of my spiritual practice is being a vision keeper. My experience is if even one person can contemplate a scene and have faith in a successful outcome, that can entrain the consciousness of everyone who was aware of it. Last month, I wasn’t the only one –> Holding the vision.  A Facebook friend commented: “I have a few I’d like to forget… That’s the brain’s biggest flaw. It never forgets. Might not remember it, but the mind can not forget. I wish it could.” I understand what he’s saying.  The mind’s biggest benefit is that you can recall something painful and then train yourself into a better feeling thought. In this practice, you do it over and over and eventually the thought is not gone but the pain of it leaves you.  About half of my session work is helping people re-frame past events in order to see the lesson in it and discover their new and improved place in the world AFTER that painful event.  It’s been said that when just 1% of the population meditates upon peace and lovingkindness, the effect spreads to the other 99% – and it works even if they don’t believe it.

Some things I am being reminded of as painting, like: don’t take score too soon. I always do an underpainting and then paint up in layers. When I do that, it goes through some pretty scary stages, sometimes where I think I should scrap the whole project. I take a photo at every stage so I can see my progress. This also lets me see if I did a better version before and if I’ve goofed it up, I can use the better version as a reference to fix it.  I’m currently working on something that is a little small, so I am waiting for some art pens to arrive so I can do the face and fine details like the fingernails. I usually do the eyes first on a painting so that I can have somebody to look at and talk to me as I’m doing it. It’s a little disconcerting to just have a blank face staring back at me giving me no feedback as I paint. It makes me wonder how often do I depend on feedback to stay motivated?

Hands open to take your pain from you

The faces for this series I’m doing of paintings as a shamanic soul retrieval project come to me before the symbolism comes. In common they have hands open in offering and a moon or moonstone.  Inspired by a friend’s cat eye, I call this one Janelle and as I began painting, her story unfolded for me.  Moonstone is an expression of the yin, the soothing energy of the moon.  A stone for “new beginnings,” moonstone is a stone of inner growth and strength, soothing emotional instability and stress.  When she revealed herself as a remover of pain, I painted her reaching her hands out to receive.  On her forehead is an ancient symbol of healing: the spiral depicts the natural rhythm of life, and the healing power that is constantly radiated from the cosmos around us.  I’ve painted shakti sparks outside the aura encircling her hands, showing they are energized and powerful.  Continue reading →

I notice I’ve been making the eyes blue and green on each face in this series I’m doing of paintings as a shamanic soul retrieval project.  This is Rosa. I meditated on the colors and Edgar Cayce came to mind.  In his Color Meanings Of Auras, blue is considered the color of the spirit, prayer and contemplation. It signifies having found one’s work and being heavily immersed in it.  Green is the color of health, vitality and healing. A green with blue in it signifies truthfulness and trustworthyness Wearing and viewing these colors imparts that quality, so I use the blue and green of the eyes I paint to raise the level of healing vibration.  I work the color until I can feel it.  At this point in the piece to the left, I’ve just added her hand. Each of the paintings in this series will be handing me something. Which is ironic because I’ve never been good at drawing or painting hands; most were just suggestions or maybe a paw or lobster claw.  I found myself studying online tutorials to get a grasp of the hand.  Also ironic because it was a car accident in 2000 that knocked my own hands out of commission and halted my painting for several years.   Continue reading →

I’ve been doing a series of paintings as a form of shamanic soul retrieval. As I paint, I meditate on the images that come to mind, which I take to depict a part of me.  I’m then taken on a journey, via inner imagery and creative visualization, to the astral realm where I connect with the individual messengers and power totems that will be included in each piece.  This one I call Moon Gal with Raven and Moonstone. Raven activates the energy of magic and links it to our will and intention. The raven shows us how to go into the dark of our inner self and bring out the light of our true self, resolving inner conflicts which have long been buried. Moon Gal has an extra long neck representing giraffe energy.  Giraffes see from the higher perspective and are able to reach things most can’t.  They like to stick their neck out and they remain high above the fray. The neck is the bridge between the worlds, so I often elongate it, signifying being on that journey.   Continue reading →

Last night someone moved my garbage can to the end of the block. Odd to think someone was right outside and I didn’t know it. It’s deja vu all over again!  I always set the bins out on the street the night before.  My odd hours have me often working overnights and my office overlooks the street. When it’s cool outside I have the window open. I had it closed last night as I worked in the office from midnight til 6:00am, so I didn’t hear anyone rolling my bin to the end of the block.  That would have made a lot of noise. It’s odder to think someone would put it in their vehicle and drive it to the end of the block and toss it on the ground.  People do crazy things!  Continue reading →

The Magical Healing Shower came to me years ago as I stood exhausted at the end of a very long and challenging day. I stepped into the shower and asked that the water remove the stress of the day. I was immediately transported into very healing session. I do the same during full moon as I bask in the moon beam.  Here’s the process:   Continue reading →

I wrote earlier in My spiritual lesson from the Brighthouse repairman that being without internet and phone after the lightning flash led me to contemplate what a lost signal meant on my path to personal growth. I’d been feeling a little off signal and like I was ready for a reboot. Now that I’m back in the art studio after years away, I’m feeling re-motivated and back in the slot.  I know one reason is that art is a form of meditation for me, and more meditation and self reflection is always good for me. In shamanic fashion, I’ve been working on a series of paintings for the purpose of  soul retrieval, showing the spirit version of the various fragmented parts of myself, each bringing back a healed part.

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It’s been a busy few days. This is supposed to be my rest and recupe week after getting the magazine to press, but I’ve mostly worked each day. “What’s the difference,” a friend asked, “between a work day and a vacation day if you’re still at home on the computer all day?” Good question. The answer is: no matter where my body is, no matter what the appearance, my experience is formed in my mind according to my focus. No matter where my eyes are looking, it is my inner eye that sees. It is my mind that takes me on the journey and the mental journey becomes my experience.

I was able to paint only sporadically this week, but I took breaks to watch some tutorial videos.  Although I don’t paint in a photorealistic style, watching tutorials is the same as me attending a class or workshop and I always learn something.    Continue reading →