I bought a “smart” tv today. Youtube was one of the things I wanted a smart tv for. YouTube has a lot of instructional videos and right now I’m into watching art lessons and workout shows. I asked on Facebook “I bought a new smart tv, how do I get it to stream from my iPad or my laptop? What do I need for it to do that?” The problem was I was asking the wrong question. I asked how to stream data from my iPad or laptop to the new tv, so that’s what everyone answered. My question should have been, “How do I watch YouTube videos on my new smart tv?” The answer would have been “click on the app.” But I didn’t ask that. I didn’t know I was asking the wrong question. So I spent several hours today unnecessarily involved in info gathering. Continue reading
Author Archives: Andrea
REM sleep rocks!
Insomnia sure puts a dent in my festival of sleep. I’m always answering one more email or making one last edit and then end up crashed in the living room rather than just going to bed at first yawn. Then, as now, at 3:00am, contemplating which of valerian root, melatonin, coffea cruda, Calm’s Forte or GABA might let me sleep the most effectively today. On the plus side, with insomnia, I always have the time for yoga, meditation, creative visualization and working out. On the other hand, REM sleep rocks! I’ve been catching up on sleep. I had interesting dream, Tony Bennett singing Bob Marley’s Exodus in true Tony Bennett fashion. I love Tony Bennett, but this was just disturbing. Then I was handed my weekly paycheck for $11,538.47. As soon as I opened the envelope, the amount was displayed on large screen tvs that surrounded me. I wrote the amount down as soon as I woke up. I wondered what my tax implication for the year would be on $600k. Thanks REM sleep.
Armadillo Medicine!
Coming back from the mailbox, I saw a lone armadillo along the garden path, foraging in the mulch. They usually travel in families but she was alone today. I love armadillo energy. It is all about defining space, setting boundaries, and letting things roll right off. I’ve had to cancel a few phone sessions because of my voice, and armadillo reminds me to roll myself up in my own positive energy, that my own medicine is within myself.
It isn’t easy having a recluse as a partner
What really rocks is having a boyfriend who understands the concept of me holding a silent retreat with myself at my own home and helps me maintain the atmosphere to stay in the bhav. It takes a certain kinda partner to grok a mate who is by nature a recluse. I couldn’t have made a better choice if I’d done it on purpose.
To all the “sensitives” out there complaining of everyone else’s “negative energy” attaching to them, if you cleared up and released your own past baggage, it would have nothing to attach to. Big Giant Secret: No one can weave a bond of discord with you if you contribute no strands to the weaving.
My dad died on Father’s Day 1987
My dad died on Father’s Day 1987. This is only a sad story if we believe there is only one life and this is it. I KNOW IT IS NOT. This is not a sad story to me. This is a success story of someone who made a hard decision and chose his own way out, in his own time. Today marks 37 years since my dad committed suicide age 62. He could be psychologically abusive. He smacked us at times. He was what they now call bi-polar. He used to drink Canadian Club. As teens, none of us got along with him, the typical syndrome when you think you hate your father.
He was strict and controlling. He had a 6th grade education, worked construction. I know now that he did a long hard job and came home to kids who smart mouthed him. That couldn’t have been easy. He mellowed after my youngest brother, Bobby, committed suicide in 1976 at the age of 22.
Daddy took massive amounts — up to 80+ a day at the end (that’s like 3 an hour, he seldom slept) — of Tylenol 4 with codeine due to a back injury that left him partially disabled. Pain controlled his life. Years of drinking and Rx had taken its toll on his judgment and he could see no way out. In 1987, he shot himself, as my brother did 11 years earlier.
My father was a troubled soul, a shell shocked (PTSD) veteran, alcoholic, addicted to painkillers from an injury. After he shot himself, he was in a coma for almost 2 weeks before he dropped his body. The night nurse would tell me that he was “marching” in his sleep. Even in sleep he was working out his stuff. I left dad’s bedside at Baptist Hospital in Miami where I’d signed for him to be taken off life support and it was a cathartic 3 hours drive home north along highway AIA, the ocean drive. Mom held a lot of guilt that dad kept so many secrets and estranged his family, yet her choice was to stay or leave. She stayed as long as she could.
When loved ones are passing, know that our consciousness links up with theirs and we are able to send them love and comfort and have the final conversations we could never have in waking life. Know that nothing unsaid ever needs to remain unresolved.
He died on Father’s Day. Free at last, Daddy.
How to forgive and find closure if the other is unwilling, absent or dead
The End of Death As We Know It
If you could see where I have gone
Revisiting the childhood father energy
What I “have”? What I don’t “have”?
Thomas DuJardin
If I am only paying attention to the physical, I am missing everything. This body is such a small fraction of what is. Thomas duJardin
After the Ecstasy, the Laundry: Housework as a Spiritual Path
Laundry has never been an issue. No kids, I’ve always done my own and my mates do their own. I’ll wear something until I sweat in it. Lately I’ve been working in the yard a few times a day = more laundry. Working out every day = more laundry. Thus, Sunday morning has become laundry day. The past year I’ve been staying home Sunday mornings, taking a break from church to catch up on personal time. I like having nowhere I have to be and no one to answer to. I’ve found that doing the laundry is a valid spiritual path. Keeping my own home clean and cleared of unnecessary items has become a great metaphor for keeping my life clear and uncluttered. When I find things piling up, that reveals my state of mind. Continue reading
Create more space for intimacy – don’t bring unresolved baggage into a new relationship
Jeff Brown
soulshaping.com
When I would go to bed with a woman when I was young, I didn’t realize that there were many of us in the bed at the same time. There was her and I, her parents, my parents, our past lovers and anyone else we had unfinished business with. That’s the thing about being unconscious – we can’t help but bring our unresolved baggage into every other relational encounter. We imagine it’s just the two of us, but our projections and patterns ensure that the bed is symbolically filled with many others.Talk about an unwelcome orgy! A little hard to move around freely with so many projections on the mattress. One of the reasons we do the work to heal our past is so that we can actually create more space for intimacy. With our patterns fallen away, we stand a much better chance of holding love safe. With our projections worked through, we can actually see the beloved with clear eyes. Finally, its just the two of us… Jeff Brown
Related: Satori in the Bedroom
I love it when I attract the best case scenario
Next week is the bf’s birthday and he deserves something special. Gotta love an even tempered man who knows what’s important in life. In 12 months we’ve had zero arguments and I’ve belly-laughed out loud every single day. How does it get any better than this?