Thanks for everyone’s concern and amusement, but he’s entitled to do whatever he feels led to do.  If the fact that his own counsel has not served him well to date, and that he’s never ended a relationship – marriage, job, family – honorably is a red flag, proceed with caution.  I’d only seek counsel from those who were more emotionally stable than I. If their life was a shambles, how could they help me?  They could only view me through the filters of their own issues and limitations, which is the only way any of us view anyone.  So what do I think now that he’s advertising himself as a spiritual counselor? I think he is unaware of some legal definitions and the criteria for using them. Life coach and spiritual leader? I think everyone’s entitled to follow their ever-changing dream.  I’m told he’s not removed the post accusing me of getting him kicked off Facebook, altho he has since learned it was his own doing.  That’s ok,  At the time he wrote that, that was what he thought was a reality.  He’s allowed to have his thoughts. Bless him. I can only wish for him what I wish for myself.

I’ve been coming in and out all evening, watering the front trees and watching the bright crescent moon move across the sky. I love this time of evening, outside in nature alone. I love to be outside, watching the moon from my firepit area or just from the driveway.  I can bask in its light and feel it melt into me.  At sundown, I went outside and pruned my younger loquat trees  to make them fill out.  Tomorrow I’ll get out the ladder and trim some of the larger trees.  It never occurred to me to cut them back before, and today and tomorrow are good pruning days.  The mulberry tree could use pruning back as well.  I will do that tomorrow while I am hauling the ladder around.  Final layout proceeds apace with the June magazine, I’ll get on it again first thing in the morning.

Yay, a friend has a new vocation! Reminder: Before you begin advertising your services, make sure you’ve done your research and obtained any required city and county licenses ahead of time (one for each service you offer,) done your fictitious name registration, and obtained bonding and insurance if needed.  Have a tax accountant set you up for estimated quarterly  payments to the IRS, maintain a daily mileage book and keep all business receipts together. Don’t even think about working under the table or not claiming cash payments.  It’s really easy to stay legit and not have to be looking over your shoulder all the time. You’ll make more money, too, because you’ll have nothing to hide = less resistance, faster attraction.

I don’t have time to return your call yet you see me playing on Facebook? There’s a reason for that.  I play on FB when I have a few moments, rebooting the computer or just taking a break. If your call has to do with business, I return it when I’m at the desk and ready for the call with info at hand.  That’s all!

Ignore it.
Don’t react to it.
Don’t even know it’s happening.
Move on to your next fun thang.

Blessed are those who know how to communicate with honesty and kindness when they are ready to leave a relationship. Never stay for a moment with anyone or any job you’re ready to be free from. If it’s time for a break, tell them so. At once. Care enough to talk it out and make an honorable exit. This is how you remain friends for life. The test of one’s character is how one has left others in the past.

I forgot how totally cool it is to share space with someone who has the same basic sadhana, or daily practice I have.  A friend has been visiting and mostly keeping to himself in the master suite, working on a writing project.  Twice a day we’ve been doing yoga and meditation together.  He’s doing silence this week so we don’t speak, but simply sitting and stretching together is a powerful interaction.  Attuning our breathing to each other, our body movements in the poses, with complete awareness yet in complete silence.   Sitting side by side to meditate,  there’s a definite difference in the energy of the room, with two rather than one. He helped me re-route grape vines to make a canopy over a sunny area in the back west woods.  He picked up a lot of the branch deadfall and stacked it in the firepit area as I swept off the back porch.  Part of the silence is also not making eye contact, to give each other complete privacy. It’s a powerful practice, forcing one to choose carefully what needs to be said and what does not.  It’s amazing how much does NOT need to be said. I’m not talking about a vow of silence forever, this is just taking a week’s break at a time to reboot the body, mind and spirit.  My house is feeling like a yogi’s home again, after a year of being a householder.  I loved it then, and I love it Now.

From Illumina Bast : Owning my worth on a level I have never actually known in this body. (FINALLY)  Thank you to everyone who has ever been a f*@/ing douchebag to me, everyone who has overlooked and underestimated me, everyone who found me expendable and unworthy of decency, everyone who honors me, who saw my worth even when I couldn’t, everyone Who Knows WHO I AM. I love you. Thank you for adding kindling and wind to this massive fucking bonfire. I will use it to light the world on fire.

My mom and I were close, speaking every day, never arguing, she was my best friend. I always thought I’d freak when she passed, which she did suddenly on April 8, 1996.  I didn’t freak.  I didn’t grieve.  I felt there was no separation.  I still don’t feel she’s missing from my life. I’ve ever been a sentimental person. I’ve never been family oriented. In the 80′s, I co-raised a stepdaughter from ages 10-13.  I love my family, but family life is not for me.  Mom was the one who kept in touch with everyone. It’s only 17 years later I think I might have liked a copy of her address book.  I figure whoever is meant to find me will find me, like cousin Laurie who found me on Facebook. Laurie and I are much alike and she’s fun to connect with. Mom would be laughing with us today. Happy Mother’s Day to the one who inspired me that giving others hope for a brighter future makes it come to pass for all of us so much quicker. I love you, Mommy! Have  good day floating on your cloud playing a harp or rocking in your chair on your porch with your cat Lady in your lap, whatever it is you’re doing Up There or Over There. I can’t say you’re missed because I know you’ve never left.

RELATED: I remember Momma 2011
I remember Momma 2010
 I remember Momma 2009 (Poem: If you could see where I have gone)
A Friend and I Talk About Dying and Easy Transitions
The End of Death As We Know it  – What The Crossing Over Experience 
Was Like, As Reported By Those Who Made The Transition

This week I’ve given over the master suite to a yogi friend, so he has his own garden entrance and bath.  He’s fasting and on silent retreat. It’s nice to have someone to meditate and do yoga with twice a day. It reminds me of living in functional silence in the ashram years ago, sharing space yet no voices. That’s a familiar and comfortable place for me. Since he’s fasting, he can hole himself up and do his work without the distraction of meal preparation and eating. I’m staying out of the east garden while he’s here, so he has complete privacy.  Since 2001, I’ve stored some boxes for him, so he removed those and organized the shed for me. There’s workshop space now! I’ve been spending time on the back porch, sketching the cardinals building the new nest not seven feet away from me as I sit in the rocker with my sketchpad. The nest so far is mostly moss and thin twigs, some strands of my hair, they made a lot of progress on it today.  Tonight we got some good rain on the back porch roof, I love to hear that, and the wind was sounding the chimes in the courtyard… I love the sounds of nature. I like the feeling of sharing space for a short time with someone of like mind, of communion with a friend without having to engage in nonstop conversation. I like the feeling of someone working on their own project in another room and me working on mine, and us not feeling the need to update each other with everything we’re doing or get into a bunch of idle talk.  The Universe is showing me new things to like and appreciate. May it ever be so.