Wednesday April 29, 2009. I goofed. I made this post before I left for Ocala this morning and thought I published it and find I did not. Sorry about that, here it is. Well, no Facebook posts for you today. Yesterday I took it easy and stayed in my bedroom for most of the morning. I typically fall asleep in the chair in the living room, proof reading. It’s kind of uncomfortable, which is the point. I don’t keep a recliner or comfortable couch in there because I don’t want to become a couch potato. I usually get up after a few hours and wander into my bedroom about 3am for another hour or two of sleep before I get into my day. This time I wheeled the laptop (it’s on a rolling hospital tray) into the bedroom with me. My room stays nice and pitch dark, which is very healing and restful to me. As soon as I walk into the other parts of the house, there is lots of sunlight, which wakes me right up. So I wanted to stay in a restful mood as long as I could. It reminds me of when I used to travel so much. I would get the best rest at hotels, since the rooms get real cold and dark, perfect for sleeping. Half my time in a hotel room is always spent at the laptop working in the middle of the night. So when I have the laptop in my bedroom at home, it has a bit of a vacationy, out of town feel to it.
I wasn’t even going to write this, since I don’t like bringing people’s attention to anything less than happy or up. No matter that something is a fact of life. A couple of times this week I’d noticed yard snakes just a little too close to the cardinal nest. Living in a wooded area, there is lots of wildlife here and snakes are part of that. I’m used to it. They don’t freak me out. They are harmless for the most part, in fact I’ve never seen a poisonous snake on my property, ever. I usually let the snakes go when the cats bring them in the house or corner them outside. But I killed three snakes this week. I wrote about two of them in Facebook. I think I was feeling a little too proud of myself, and vibrating there too long. When I got up yesterday, the nest had been disturbed, and the cardinal family was gone.
The nest was not completely destroyed, but it was empty and in disarray. The hatchlings usually fly in 10 days, and they were only 6 days old but had most of their feathers. I later saw the mama and papa cardinal out at the bird bath, and could hear them in the east woods. My story is that they moved the nest. It’s possible that is what happened. Either way, it’s just the cycle of life.
A couple of people asked on Facebook about the nest, and I told them the story as I see it. Maybe they did not move the nest. Maybe that is not the truth. But it’s the story that makes me feel better. It is a story that doesn’t make anyone go “Ewwwww, gross!” and have thoughts and visions in their mind of things they do not want to happen to them or anyone they know. It’s a story that lets others play over and over again in their minds a happy scene of a happy life.
And that’s my story across the board. I have a happy life, and when things like this happen, they happen. It is what it is. But I don’t have to recount every sad or violent thing that happens to me when I talk to others. The story I tell to others reflects just how I see my world.
I don’t see the world as predatory and scary. I see the world as a welcoming and loving place, full of opportunity. As a well stocked kitchen, as Abraham-Hicks says, with everything in it that I need to create a beautiful and fulfilling life. Do scary things happen? Sure. Do predators exist? Sure. But that doesn’t have to be my focus. I don’t need to continue to talk about those things and lament them and grieve over them and draw everyone else into the chain of pain.
My story is that life is good and fun and full of opportunity. My story is that I live a happy life with great friends and family and fulfilling activities. My story is that I have all I need and am always receiving more and more. And it’s not just a story. It’s really my life. Do bumps happen? Sure. Are they the norm? Not by any means.
A few months ago I began sending out a newsletter, and got an email from a very critical friend about “what a nightmare” the format was. I asked him for a remedy and he said simply “you just plain have to learn how to do this.” Ken does not understand law of attraction, and went on to say, “As long as you keep peddling new-age snake oil the deities of rationality and common sense will continue to screw up your efforts.” I guess I don’t see a goofy looking newsletter as screwing up my efforts. That may be what he sees. I’m always into content over form, though. When I see someone’s newsletter and it’s obviously not professionally and technically perfect, I could really care less. I look to see what they are saying to me. I look to see what the message is they are trying to get across to me. I look for their story behind the appearance of it all.
Is my way better? No. Does my way make people feel at ease and let them know I understand them, or are trying to? Yes. And that’s my point. I, too, used to be that cynical, smart ass, sarcastic person that took pride in one-upping anyone I imagined myself to be smarter than, better than, more (fill in the blank) than. And now? Now I realize what it’s all about. Now I realize we’re all in this together. Now I do my best to help make everyone’s life a little easier.
That’s my story and I’m sticking to it.