Bless the messengers sent to shine light on shadows not fully released

Domino has been having some spectacular insights and I can relate. He wrote of someone who’d contacted him full of anger, fear and resentment. He wrote how although it was painful, he understood how they saw it the way they did and this person was clearly a messenger to shine light on shadow he’d not yet released. I resonated with it as it reminded me of my ex publicly declaring “wanting to mend the past” and instead privately blowing up and coming up with all new fibs and accusations he never brought up during the relationship. I judged he repaid my kindness and compassion with hatefulness and deceit. Only now do I realize he was being as sincere as he could be. I attracted out of him exactly what I experienced, so vibrationally I was not a victim but a volunteer. I apologize for not being more conscious. It’s never my place to judge, ever. I am only now coming to realize the lessons learned from my messenger.  Domino writes: “Thank you Facebook friends. I am feeling happier than I’ve felt in months and you really helped me. ”  

“I don’t have a therapist or recovery group at this time so I am extra grateful for your support. As you may know, 4 days ago we received a litany of texts on our phone that were extremely unsupportive of my character and integrity. I was driving at the time and at one point, my wife said that they were so unkind and ugly that maybe she should stop reading them. I said, “no, read them all because I want to know exactly how this person feels.” This went on for three days which included an amazing humble, self-responsible apology from him only to be followed by more of the same. It closed with my friend asking for “a few weeks of space”.

Although almost all of the insinuations were judgmental and projections, they were still an accurate depiction of how they felt about me so they were completely valid from that standpoint. I chose to see this as a cry for love and went out of my way not to defend, blame, criticize or contradict. I just apologized for not treating them the way they desired and said I was saddened to hear that I lost their trust. Probably the most painful part was that they brought up things from years ago that they had held in resentment all that time, including having lost respect for me but didn’t share it with me until now. I felt a bit blind-sided and it was so darn cumulative.  I have learned so much from this situation. I believe that this person was a gift and a messenger to me to shine light on some shame and guilt shadow I had not fully released. As usual, the Universe along with My Soul conspired on my behalf to evolve me. Thank you God!”
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Andrea: My experience is the Universe always conspires with our Soul to evolve us. One thing I love about Domino is he lets us in on his journey: the good, the bad and the ugly. He admits where he’s goofed up, cops to his stuff, he tells the lessons he’s learned and how he got there.  That is what teaches.  Domino knows his life is his message. My life is my message. Your life is your message.  What message are you sending out?

Domino a few days later: Wow, I just saw this and I feel so embarrassed. A friend of mine called me on this post because she felt that it was disrespectful to the person I was writing about because it shared details publicly that I received privately by him. I took her words to heart and checked in. What I came up with was that in my attempt to be authentic, I said many passive aggressive disrespectful attacking things in that post and I went back and edited it (to this: ” As you may know, 4 days ago I had a very challenging situation with a friend that did not end well. I felt my character was being challenged and I did not feel respected be him. It also brought up lots of unhealed samskaras from my past that I have been processing and releasing.”) to be more considerate of him. I also made sure I blocked him from seeing that post but, if I feel the need to block, there must be something unloving about the post. Anyway, that’s my take on all of this. Let me know what you think. BTW, if you are planning to put it in Horizons, I would appreciate it if I can edit it to be more loving on my part. I am still a recovering codependent, not fully recovered.

Andrea: I (for one) didn’t know who you were talking about. The name wasn’t important. I saw it as a Universal lesson and an important one. It was the details that connected me to it and led me to insight. The lesson is always in the mundane details, which is how many authors edit themselves out of relevance. Even now, important are your words “I said many passive aggressive disrespectful attacking things” as it made me see I did the same in my original post here. But I said it. I did it. It’s part of my journey from doing something unconsciously (or deliberately passive aggressive) to becoming aware of another facet to clean and polish to reflect more light. And part of my mission is sharing my journey, how I get from here to there, because all of us are going thru the same things and the only difference is I talk about how I find my way. I don’t have to share YOUR journey but I do have to share the message and the lesson. I can either remove your name from the post, or I can edit it to add whatever you wish by way of disclaimer that you wished the edited version to appear instead, and why.