I am doing it again! I’m pouty because I gave my power away to my ego once again, and by ego I mean the personality based, lower s self of me, not the large S Soul of me. Yesterday I told a friend I would give them a ride this afternoon then I rearranged about 4 hours worth of appointments up in Melbourne since I would be up there anyway. I called to ask when they thought they would be ready and they said, “Oh, I changed my mind. I do not need a ride today.” Grrr… I know better than to plan a day ahead of time to be awake and driveable after 2pm. My ego gets so stuck on “oh, I’ll be their hero since they have no one else,” so I have only myself to blame. 

I can’t give friends sh*t for not doing what is right for them if I’m not doing what’s right for me.  I too often appoint myself The One Who Can Change Everything For Them and then I have a good time laughing at myself when I wake up from the EgoSnooze. At least at this stage I’m awakened enough to know I’m never a victim, always a volunteer.

On the upside, while I waited for her to call, I got my billing done a week early! I even called to ask the boyfriend if he’d like to ride with us. Thankfully he was busy, so I didn’t crumb up his day with my changed schedule and pouty puss.

I took my aggression out at Thrifty Produce by buying eggplant, red peppers, Fuji and Pink Lady apples, scallions, parsley, Bosc and Anjou pears, squash, broccoli, kale. I feel much better now. Oh, and if you need a ride, friends, don’t call me. I’m unavailable.