Monthly Archives: September 2014

Sometimes I really want my mommy

My Mom, left and her mom on the right

My Mom, left and her mom on the right

Although I know there is no separation, no “her,” no “me.” No “us,” no “them.” I know it’s just a thin veil of illusion that separates, enough to make me sometimes believe it’s actually there and not just inside my mind. Still, sometimes I really want the illusion that is or was “my mommy.”

An Egosnooze: I appoint myself The One Who Can Fix Everything

I am doing it again! I’m pouty because I gave my power away to my ego once again, and by ego I mean the personality based, lower s self of me, not the large S Soul of me. Yesterday I told a friend I would give them a ride this afternoon then I rearranged about 4 hours worth of appointments up in Melbourne since I would be up there anyway. I called to ask when they thought they would be ready and they said, “Oh, I changed my mind. I do not need a ride today.” Grrr… I know better than to plan a day ahead of time to be awake and driveable after 2pm. My ego gets so stuck on “oh, I’ll be their hero since they have no one else,” so I have only myself to blame.  Continue reading

Life is easy for me now but it was a day by day process that got me here

A friend remarked that I couldn’t understand her situation because life was easy for me. I told her life is easy now for me because I’ve been where she is and years ago began making a series of different choices to get in this better place. I didn’t get happy overnight. I spent a long time contemplating my life, having realizations and making amends. I got happy day by day by dumping old baggage and looking for stuff to be happy about.

Today you can make it easy or you can make it hard
Come clean and see what the Universe rewards you with

Comments are open again on my blog

I love that the bf knows web stuff, he showed me how to get rid of the tons of spam on my blog. I had comments closed for a couple of years because I didn’t want to deal with the spam. I just opened the comments back up, he said it was an easy fix. An easy fix for one can be a giant boon to another!

There is nothing sexier than a full grown man who takes care of his own business and makes no pretenses.

Money is as abundant as air

Money is as abundant as air, no one limits it but yourself. If there is not enough, go where there is more. You would not stay in a room with no air, what keeps you from going to find more, it’s out there, go find it and keep on task until you do. Works for everything, not just money. Terri Mermis

Don’t be fooled by appearances

I thought I would laugh myself silly this morning. At the post office, the clerk (who’s known me for years) says to me (after the bf has walked outside): You two seem like opposites, he is so serious and conservative. ROFL! I told her don’t be fooled by appearances. HE’S secretly the wild and wacky one and I’m secretly the quiet, serious one. He’s like a cross between Woody Allen, Gene Wilder and Laurel & Hardy, wrapped up in a dapper Sean Connery disguise.

America is about everyone living free to be who they are

So let me get this straight. You are from another country and you live in America and you speak your native language and fly the flag of your native country in your own yard. Um, isn’t that what America is all about that we’re allowed to freaking do that? Without being harassed by ignorant haters under the guise of patriotism? I am never offended by an inanimate object like a flag, I am offended by people who use flags like they use Bibles: to beat each other up with.  Jesus’s numero uno message was the Golden Rule, do unto others, so if you tell me you’re a Christian, don’t be hating on anyone.  Period end of story. Don’t get me wrong, I believe everyone is entitled to their opinion, even if they are ignorant and racist. I also believe everyone has a right to peaceful enjoyment, meaning keep your opinions to yourself if they will be considered harassment, hateful or shaming  another.  (Hmmm, is my intent to shame the haters here? Food for thought.)
Continue reading

The watcher at the window

What does an Aries x5 do while waiting for the faces of previous in-progress paintings to come to me? Begin another! Here’s the under painting for the Watcher at the Window. I’m not sure what colors I’ll use yet but know I wanted these as a base.  I’ve Photoshopped in this pic the moon and a few stars to remind me where I want them to go. The window on the left was initially going to be a painting of Yogananda. We’ll see…  On the left is the picture I am painting from.  I liked the image of sitting alone, gazing out the window but wanted a more open and cozy feel to the scene.  I’ll add pillows and maybe a table with a cup of tea, maybe add a cat and hang a few windchimes.  The man likes the stark look of the source photo with the focus on one window.  So do I, but he and I have a different experience when we look at that image.  It reminds me of looking out my living room window on full moon night at a home I had in Murphy, NC. A chilly night, I had the heater on and set big pillows on the futon next to the big window. The room glowed from the moonlight shining in  I followed the moon across the sky on full moon nights, and watched as it illuminated the woods and mountains.  I had three level wooded acres, 2 acres up on a bluff and the home on an acre at the base. I loved watching the moon come over the treeline of the bluff.  I did some of my best thinking at that window.