I don’t feel very organized today so I won’t try to be coherent or motivating.  I’ll just talk.  I’ve let myself get behind this week in final layout for the August Horizons Magazine.   I get behind by goofing off when I should be working.  But I know that goofing off is essential to me being able to work efficiently, so I can’t really beat myself up for goofing off.  It’s part of the process and I’ve learned to factor it in.  Like when I am flustered after taking 23 phone calls in a row and then decide to chat with a friend on the phone about nothing for an hour.  Oh, that’s what I can talk about.  Well, actually it’s a story example of vibrational matching.

I spend so much time on the phone for work, all day, half the night, that friends know not to call me to just chat.  But sometimes I want do it.  Like now, my brother just had hip replacement surgery and, although we mostly email back and forth several times a day, we’ve been doing the phone each day while he’s recuping.  In fact, he and I sometimes send so many emails back and forth that we are using it like an instant message system.  That quickly adds up to hundreds of emails each week sometimes.  But it’s easier to do that when we’re both working in other programs on other screens.  Plus Brothermine sends me lots of screen shots and step by step instructions to do technical stuff, so a phone call wouldn’t do.

My friend Star and I also use email as instant messages for the same reason.  But sometimes, despite our best efforts, we just can’t seem to keep the connection long enough to finish a phone call this week.  It was easy to explain it as a broken phone and waiting for the replacement to arrive, or the minutes on the prepaid card running out hours ahead of time.  But it kept happening over and over, and I finally got it that I needed to stay focused on work and not goof off this week, no matter how fun and engaging and outrageous she can be.

Star is one of those fun people who let everything be an adventure and knows that somehow she’ll always be taken care of, although she seldom knows from day to day how that will happen. I look forward to her calls.   She’s had some tough breaks and is finally free of an abusive partner and was lucky to escape with her sanity and her life.  She doesn’t care that she’s got little else and, at the age of 60, she has to be starting all over again, literally with nothing.

She knows that somehow a way will be made… even where she sees no way.  She keeps her eyes out for opportunities.  This week she bought a truckload of watermelons for $2.50 a piece and has been selling them roadside in North Carolina for $5.  She’s a smart cookie.  It took her awhile to wake up and wise up but she’s on a roll now.  It tickled me pink to learn this is what she is doing for work right now.  Of course she’s looking for something else she is qualified for, but she just moved and is getting settled into the new routine and that will all come with time.

So I am not surprised when our phone connection begins to suddenly and repeatedly break every time she gets on the topic of her past troubles.  She knows and I know that talking about that only serves to make her vibrate in that place again.  And that doesn’t feel good to either of us.  But she’s used to telling the story once she gets started, and it’s hard not to tell it.  It was part of who she was for so long. And since I just won’t go there emotionally when she does, that’s when I lose her. Literally.  Her phone cuts off.  We lose the connection.

As soon as we realized what was happening, we had a laugh about it.  I asked her once if she thought we had a hand in attracting the reality we experience and she emailed back “Yes, my messy fingerprints are all over everything.”  I loved that.

So was the Universe telling us that Andrea needed to work and Star needed to stop strolling down memory lane?  Was that why we got disconnected?

Or that simply because we were in two different mind states at the time, that we were out of vibrational harmony with each other, thus the connection wouldn’t hold?  Which was it?

Or was it just a broken phone and running out of minutes and that’s all, nothing else?

Is it ever really just that?