{"id":9911,"date":"2010-07-28T11:52:52","date_gmt":"2010-07-28T16:52:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?p=9911"},"modified":"2010-07-28T11:52:52","modified_gmt":"2010-07-28T16:52:52","slug":"mtvs-if-you-really-knew-me-can-you-take-the-challenge","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/mtvs-if-you-really-knew-me-can-you-take-the-challenge\/","title":{"rendered":"MTV’s If You Really Knew Me – Can You Take The Challenge?"},"content":{"rendered":"
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I love You ASL hand sign<\/p><\/div>\n

I previously wrote about this show at Heart Breaths, Encounter Groups and MTV\u2019s If You Really Knew Me<\/a>.\u00a0 Each episode of If You Really Knew Me<\/a> takes place at a different high school, and follows several students from different cliques as they go through the life-changing experience of Challenge Day<\/a>, a one-day program that breaks down emotional walls and completely changes the way students view their school and each other.\u00a0 Challenge Day<\/a> addresses common issues seen at most schools including cliques, gossip, rumors, negative judgments, teasing, harassment, isolation, stereotypes, intolerance, racism, sexism, bullying, violence, homophobia, hopelessness, apathy, and hidden pressures to create an image, achieve or live up to the expectations of others.<\/p>\n

The Challenge Day<\/a> Leaders begin with a short presentation.\u00a0 They are excellent speakers and keep their sentences short.\u00a0 An iceberg is drawn on the board, showing 10% above the waterline and 90% below.\u00a0 We’re like that, too<\/em>, the kids are told.\u00a0 The top 10% is what everyone sees, that’s our image.\u00a0 The other 90% is what lies within us, who we are at home and what we think about our life and how we really feel about everything in it. It’s that 90% that is what we deal with every day and that 90% is what’s real.\u00a0 That means the other 10% is fake.\u00a0 And Challenge Day is all about breaking down walls and getting real.<\/p>\n

One profound game\/exercise they do is Crossing The Line<\/a>.\u00a0 Some of the more serious statements were “If you’ve ever felt abandoned or alone, cross the line.\u00a0 If you’ve ever had your family torn apart through drugs or alcohol, cross the line.\u00a0 If you’ve ever contemplated suicide, cross the line.\u00a0 Cross the line if gunshots are a part of your everyday life.\u00a0 Cross the line if you have ever teased, belittled or hurt someone because you were jealous.”\u00a0 The purpose of the exercise, which is performed in silence, is to teach the participants about oppression and that everyone is in a minority.\u00a0 The hall becomes filled with the majority of the students crossing the line back and forth.<\/p>\n

They then break up into small groups of maybe 7 each and sit in a circle, close enough that knees are touching.\u00a0 They are asked to close their eyes and relax into that quiet space inside them where they can be who they are and see who they are and experience who they are.\u00a0 Then, eyes open, one by one, they go around the circle and finish the sentence If you Really Knew Me, You Would Know <\/em>…<\/p>\n

One of the Challenge Day Leaders is Vinny Ferraro<\/a>, a kind of scary looking gang bangin type that wins your heart the moment he opens his mouth.\u00a0 Vinny says, “If you Really Knew Me, You Would Know I felt alone most of my life.\u00a0 When my mom died, when I was 17, I truly found out the meaning of alone. My parents were drug addicts. I chose to escape most of my teenage years with drugs, and transitioning into volunteer work saved my life. I wasted twenty years being cool, and feeling alone, and refuse to waste one more moment.
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When the kids open up to each other, face to face, they feel connected to them, they see they all have big struggles they are going through, and they see they are more similar than they thought before Challenge Day.\u00a0 Last night’s show was about cyber-bullying<\/a>.\u00a0 When they were asked to cross the line if they had ever been hurt or ridiculed by a classmate through public texts or online means, about 3\/4 of the room crossed the line.\u00a0 Each side of the room was asked to look back at the other side and see if they saw anyone they had hurt, or been hurt by.<\/p>\n

I thought of some of the people I see on Facebook that slam each other left and right, spill secrets, gossip and spread rumors, something I don’t think they’d do in person.\u00a0 We all know people like that.\u00a0\u00a0 I wonder if they’d be willing to cross the line and stand face to face.\u00a0 The students would signal support to each other by raising their hands in the American Sign language sign for “I love you.”\u00a0 The transformation in just 6 hours is awe inspiring.<\/p>\n

Challenge Day really begins, they are told, the next day when you wake up and go to school and have the chance to do things differently, to treat all the other students differently.\u00a0 They have an assembly where some of the Challenge Day participants are asked to tell what they experienced.\u00a0 They challenge the students to break the cliques, stop the gossip and rumors, stop the negative judgments, harassment, isolation and intolerance.\u00a0 To say hi to kids they don’t know, to give a smile, to hold out a hand and be a friend, to hang out with people they don’t normally hang out with, to look for ways to be helpful and make everyone feel included.\u00a0 They asked those students willing to take that challenge, to please stand, and the auditorium\u00a0 all stood and raised their hands, signalling support.<\/p>\n

Challenge Day is more than a one-day program. It is the spark that ignites a movement of compassion and positive change, known as the Be the Change movement<\/a>.<\/p>\n

Ghandi said it best: Be the change you wish to see in the world.<\/em><\/p>\n

RELATED: MTV Features Real Teens, Real Problems in New Series<\/a><\/p>\n

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