{"id":33984,"date":"2013-12-03T01:31:25","date_gmt":"2013-12-03T06:31:25","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?p=33984"},"modified":"2013-12-03T10:53:49","modified_gmt":"2013-12-03T15:53:49","slug":"its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them\/","title":{"rendered":"It&#8217;s not that he &#8220;hides&#8221; his feelings, he just doesn&#8217;t ponder them"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><a href=\"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?page_id=3378\">Domino<\/a>\u00a0complained her new man wasn&#8217;t very open hearted, but knowing them both for years, I know that&#8217;s not it. He just has a different way of being than her previous partners. He&#8217;s far less cerebral and wouldn&#8217;t consider himself a spiritual person. After we spoke, she looked at him in a different way and, although it wasn&#8217;t exactly what she wanted, she understood and loved him enough to try the change. \u00a0I&#8217;d told her, &#8220;It&#8217;s not that he&#8217;s hiding his feelings from you by refusing to discuss them. It&#8217;s that he doesn&#8217;t reflect on his feelings to sort them out as you do. \u00a0And I&#8217;m not being flippant but he does not have deep thoughts. He prefers to spend time in his own interests and not get real involved in personal conversation, with anyone. That&#8217;s not how he&#8217;s made. Don&#8217;t fault him if this is as deep as he goes with you. That doesn&#8217;t mean he cares any less. \u00a0It just means he doesn&#8217;t carry the tools for that job, so don&#8217;t ask him to do it. Yes, he&#8217;s the one you want to talk to about personal matters of the heart, but I suggest you don&#8217;t. He does not receive it as you offer it. He just thinks you&#8217;re &#8220;rambling on again about one of your problems&#8221; and waits for you to stop talking so he can get back to what he was doing. \u00a0Bless him, this is as deep as he goes right now. \u00a0It&#8217;s up to you to decide if that&#8217;s deep enough for you.&#8221; She&#8217;s giving it a try.<\/p>\n<p>RELATED: <a href=\"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?p=33964\">Friends who step away when you&#8217;re in pain<\/a><\/p>\n<div id=\"s-share-buttons\" class=\"horizontal-w-c-circular s-share-w-c\"><a href=\"http:\/\/www.facebook.com\/sharer.php?u=https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them\/\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to Facebook\" class=\"s3-facebook hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/twitter.com\/intent\/tweet?text=It&#8217;s not that he &#8220;hides&#8221; his feelings, he just doesn&#8217;t ponder them&url=https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them\/\" target=\"_blank\"  title=\"Share to Twitter\" class=\"s3-twitter hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"https:\/\/plus.google.com\/share?url=https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them\/\" target=\"_blank\"  title=\"Share to Google Plus\" class=\"s3-google-plus hint--top\"><\/a><a href=\"http:\/\/www.linkedin.com\/shareArticle?mini=true&url=https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them\/\" target=\"_blank\" title=\"Share to LinkedIn\" class=\"s3-linkedin hint--top\"><\/a><div class=\"pinit-btn-div\"><a href=\"\/\/www.pinterest.com\/pin\/create\/button\/\" data-pin-do=\"buttonBookmark\"  data-pin-color=\"red\" title=\"Share to Pinterest\" class=\"s3-pinterest hint--top\"><\/a><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t<script type=\"text\/javascript\" async defer src=\"\/\/assets.pinterest.com\/js\/pinit.js\"><\/script><a href=\"mailto:?Subject=It&#8217;s%20not%20that%20he%20&#8220;hides&#8221;%20his%20feelings,%20he%20just%20doesn&#8217;t%20ponder%20them&Body=Here%20is%20the%20link%20to%20the%20article:%20https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/its-not-that-he-hides-his-feelings-he-just-doesnt-ponder-them\/\" title=\"Email this article\" class=\"s3-email hint--top\"><\/a><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Domino\u00a0complained her new man wasn&#8217;t very open hearted, but knowing them both for years, I know that&#8217;s not it. He just has a different way of being than her previous partners. He&#8217;s far less cerebral and wouldn&#8217;t consider himself a spiritual person. After we spoke, she looked at him in a different way and, although [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-33984","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33984","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=33984"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33984\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":33995,"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/33984\/revisions\/33995"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=33984"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=33984"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=33984"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}