{"id":21836,"date":"2012-10-24T13:48:41","date_gmt":"2012-10-24T17:48:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?p=21836"},"modified":"2012-10-24T18:47:17","modified_gmt":"2012-10-24T22:47:17","slug":"i-crash-myself-out-to-recupe-from-responsibility-overload","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/i-crash-myself-out-to-recupe-from-responsibility-overload\/","title":{"rendered":"I crash myself out to recupe from responsibility overload"},"content":{"rendered":"

I have a habit of appointing myself timekeeper for other ppl and when the schedule gets too packed with reminding them of stuff they may not need to be reminded of, I feel overwhelmed. \u00a0Add to that type A display,\u00a0I just had a sudden snowball of unexpected work that changed the timing of a very tightly scheduled magazine delivery week. \u00a0The schedule changed with every phone call and text. \u00a0So far it’s worked itself out and one changed appointment has dovetailed into the next perfectly. Despite my aggravation, I was attracting a good result<\/em>. \u00a0Today was my only truly free day where I don’t have to do any<\/em> work, yet I’d told a friend I’d be their transportation at noon and again at sundown. \u00a0Then suddenly I had to arrange for a friend to meet me at a work project at 10am, which turned into 11:30am. \u00a0Ok, that one done, finished by noon, on to the next. \u00a0I began again stressing over the obligations at noon and sundown. I wanted to go home, take some valerian root and Hyland’s Calm’s Forte (natural sleep aids<\/a>) and have a festival of sleep. \u00a0I am feeling underslept. That is how anxiety begins to manifest on me. I can either sleep more or I can change my perception of how much sleep I need <\/a>and how much rest I\u2019m actually getting.<\/p>\n

I debated the issue with my friend, who is very understanding, mega cool and not worried about it. He knows he can attract what he needs when he needs it. \u00a0We’ve both seen it happen. \u00a0As soon as he arranged for the two rides into town, I felt the stress immediately lift. \u00a0Whereas before<\/em> the cancellation I was wracked with guilt because this is someone who does many favors for me and is a big upgrade to my life, afterward I felt the weight fall from my shoulders and I cried in relief. \u00a0Oh, how much drama I bring on to myself by trying to mange my pals’ lives to the detriment of my own.<\/em> \u00a0I just crack myself up sometimes.<\/p>\n

I could tell the tension was relieving when we turned a corner on the way home and an ATT truck was parked on the side of the street. \u00a0 I snarkily said, “That’s right, park right around the corner so drivers can crash right into you after the turn<\/em>.” \u00a0I laughed because I caught myself. \u00a0Sure, he was parked right after the turn, but he was half off the street and easy to see as I approached the corner. \u00a0I wasn’t in danger of hitting him. I just chose to see that as a possibility and voice it and give energy to it. \u00a0I laughed to catch myself. \u00a0May it ever be so.<\/em><\/p>\n

We only got\u00a086,400 seconds<\/a> in a day to turn it all around or to throw it all away, \u00a0We Gotta live like we’re dyin<\/a>.<\/p>\n

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