{"id":41639,"date":"2015-07-05T06:13:03","date_gmt":"2015-07-05T11:13:03","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?p=41639"},"modified":"2015-07-05T06:17:41","modified_gmt":"2015-07-05T11:17:41","slug":"sometimes-we-mistake-what-someone-is-in-our-life-for","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/sometimes-we-mistake-what-someone-is-in-our-life-for\/","title":{"rendered":"Sometimes we mistake why someone is in our life"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"Chemistry<\/a>

Chemistry means we have karma to work out and this person can help us do that<\/p><\/div>\n

I did a session with a friend last night who is disappointed in her partner. They talk about the life they are going to build together but when it comes right down to it, there\u2019s no movement forward unless she does it on her own. He\u2019s very good with his words but there\u2019s no follow through. She loves him and he\u2019s finally got a job where he can contribute, but she\u2019s wondering what her guidance is telling her to do. \u201cI know I should go toward what feels good, but I feel so many things,<\/em>\u201d she cries, \u201cI can\u2019t tell what feels good and what feels bad. When the times are good, the times are good, but I am tired of there being no follow through and no movement forward unless I do it. Help me understand what I am being guided to do.<\/em>\u201d I knew all she needed to do was to get clear on some issues and release some resistance and then she\u2019d be able to intuit for herself what her inner guidance system was signaling her to do.\u00a0 <\/p>\n

I know her partner and while as a friend he\u2019s not who I\u2019d have chosen for her, I\u2019ve also seen how she\u2019s changed since he\u2019s come on the scene. She\u2019s become more creative and expanded her business into new products and accessories she creates with her children, whom she spends more time with. His job keeps him halfway across the country for months at a time and in that time she blooms like a creative madman.<\/p>\n

She feels cheated that they have so many discussions about dreams that she is now realizing may never come true, unless she makes them come true. And if she has to do all the work, she reasons, she doesn\u2019t need him. That breaks her heart since he\u2019s the first man who\u2019s made her feel alive in years and she thought they had something.<\/p>\n

I had her remind me of why they initially got together and how it felt, and the words she used were \u201chopeful\u201d and \u201cexcited about the future\u201d and \u201cthat anything is possible and we can do it.\u201d Then she talked about how they created one business after another, each time she being the one to begin it based upon an idea he came up with and never followed through on. Some succeeded, some failed, according to her involvement with it<\/p>\n

It was easy to see the pattern. So often we mistake who someone is meant to be in our life. We are quick to think that physical chemistry means this is my soul mate or this is my foe. Chemistry means we\u2019ve got some karma to work on and this person \u2013 for better or worse — can help us do that.<\/p>\n

She had simply mistaken his purpose. He may just have been the muse needed to kick start her and make her come alive again. Maybe his purpose in her life was not to be a mate, which he was a poor one, but to be a motivator and cheerleader, which he was a great one.<\/p>\n

Had she not prematurely decided upon the label and role of a \u201cromantic partner,\u201d she might have had a very different experience with him. Had she instead given him the label of \u201cgood friend and creative advisor,\u201d she would be thanking him for motivating her on to so many projects. Yes, she thought she was doing these projects \u201cfor them\u201d but the fact is, the projects were each as successful as SHE had time to put into them.<\/p>\n

So she could choose to be pissed off that he wasn\u2019t a do-er, that he really just liked coming up with ideas but didn\u2019t care to expend much effort in actively achieving a goal. Or she could take it as an a-ha moment that she now realized something she didn\u2019t realize before: The Universe placed him in her path to inspire her and motivate her to find new ways to express herself and find joy in the expression of it. SHE was the one who decided oh, this must be my soulmate, thus placing a mantle of responsibility upon him, one that he never agreed to and didn\u2019t even know existed.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s not his fault for not being emotionally in the same place as she was, and for not having certain qualities she wants in a partner. She had simply mistaken who he was meant to be in her life.<\/p>\n

She said she felt much better about him after considering that and felt bad for all the time she spent resenting him for not following through. She now knew that following through was never his job. She also realizes that if they were on the same wave length, he wouldn\u2019t be clear across the country, he\u2019d be right here with her. Everybody is right where God wants everybody to be. It\u2019s never any other way.<\/p>\n

I love helping friends figure things out for themselves. We\u2019re all One but it takes a village!<\/p>\n

RELATED: Chemistry means you\u2019ve got karma to work out with that person<\/a><\/p>\n

<\/a><\/a><\/a><\/a>
<\/a><\/div>\n\t\t\t\t\t\t\t\t