{"id":2865,"date":"2009-05-10T06:56:23","date_gmt":"2009-05-10T11:56:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/?p=2865"},"modified":"2016-04-08T05:15:24","modified_gmt":"2016-04-08T10:15:24","slug":"i-remember-momma","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/horizonsmagazine.com\/blog\/i-remember-momma\/","title":{"rendered":"I remember Momma; If you could see where I have gone"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Happy Mother’s Day.\u00a0 Today is my mom’s birthday<\/em>.\u00a0 The photo to the right is mommy and her mom in 1953.\u00a0 Andrea<\/em> was also my mother’s name.\u00a0 She later shortened it to Anne and that is what everyone called her.\u00a0 Everyone except family.\u00a0 There, she was still Andrea and I was always called a nickname.\u00a0 When I got to first grade, the teacher had a hard time getting me to answer to Andrea since I’d never been called that.\u00a0 I always thought Andrea<\/em> was such a great name for a dark, exotic beauty like my mom.\u00a0 I always felt like the beige one<\/em> around her.\u00a0 Mom was 5’3″ tall, olive skinned with green eyes and lots of dark, wavy hair.\u00a0 She wore it halfway down her back all the time I was growing up.\u00a0 I envied her hair, since mine was whiteblonde, thin and stick straight.\u00a0 I grew up in a Latino neighborhood and went to public schools where blonde and fair was the exception rather than the rule.\u00a0 I remember grown men calling out from cars or worksites when I was a teenager “ay rubio!” which means “hey blondie”. I was a typical teenager, wanting to fit in with everyone else, and I envied the dark haired, brown skinned look.\u00a0 People\u00a0 always seemed surprised we were mother and daughter.\u00a0 My mom always seemed like some exotic queen out of a fairy tale, and I adored her completely.<\/p>\n

Mom could not have had an easy life.\u00a0 My dad was not easy to live with, but they loved each other so mom made it work.\u00a0 She became the mediator between Dad and us kids.\u00a0 He’d give us unfair restrictions and she’d cut us some slack when he wasn’t around.\u00a0 She consoled us with reminders that as soon as we were 18, we could be on our own for the rest of our life.\u00a0 She’d paint fun scenarios to look forward to and I realize now she was easing my painful now<\/em> with thoughts of a more pleasant and free future<\/em>.\u00a0 She was helping me get past the pain of the moment by helping me pivot my thoughts to what I might prefer instead, and prepave a happier life just a few years down the road.\u00a0 Mom was great at helping us keep the vibration in a fun and happy place.<\/p>\n

That is the thing I remember most about Mom – her always lightening the mood wherever she went.\u00a0 She was pretty, with a giant genuine smile and bubbly personality.\u00a0 Everyone liked being around her, and she genuinely liked everyone.<\/p>\n

She was the best role model a kid could have.\u00a0 Except not in the arena of cooking.\u00a0 Mom wasn’t the best cook, and while there were no memorable disasters, it was just ordinary fare.\u00a0 Always a meat, a starch and a vegetable.\u00a0 Oh, and a plate of sliced tomatoes atop iceberg lettuce leaves with a blob of mayo in the center,\u00a0 Dad often cooked, since he worked construction and got home at 4:00pm.\u00a0 Mom worked 11:00am-9:00pm at Western Union.\u00a0 I remember a few dishes of hers that I liked: an eggplant dish where she cooked the eggplant with onions and then mixed it with Pepperidge Farm stuffing and parmesean cheese and mayonnaise and maybe a can of soup, and then baked it in the oven.\u00a0 It was like a meatless meatloaf but we counted it as a vegetable.\u00a0 I liked that.\u00a0 And she would roast a chicken (or rabbit, since we raised them) in the oven with just rosemary and garlic and that was really good.<\/p>\n

I remember Mom getting ready for work in the morning sometimes when I’d be home from school.\u00a0 I’d lie on her bed and we’d talk while she dressed.\u00a0 It was the day of girdles with garter tops, and I’d watch fascinated as she put on her stockings.\u00a0 She always had the softest feet, and she shaved her legs every day so she seldom got snags.\u00a0 She was proud of how long her stockings would last without a run.\u00a0 She’d put on a dress and high heels and pull her hair back and be transformed in front of my very eyes.<\/p>\n

One story I recounted in Excited about Obama; Race Issues 1960<\/a>: I remember once in the car with Mom as a teenager,\u00a0we pulled up to a stoplight and the car ahead of us has a bumper sticker that said \u201cHonk if you love Jesus.\u201d\u00a0 Well, we love Jesus so Mom honks her horn.\u00a0 The woman in the car flips her the bird and shouts out the window: \u201cF*king spics (Latinos) can\u2019t wait for the light to change.\u201d\u00a0 My poor mom was mortified.\u00a0 We laughed about it later.<\/p>\n

I remember loving to sew when I was growing up, which was convenient since I was invariably restricted to my room.\u00a0 I’d make matching tops for mom and I, and we had several sets.\u00a0 Hers, however, fit on an hour glass shaped body and mine on a stick-thin kid’s body.\u00a0 She’d often wear them going out on errands, as well, so they must have fit, and she must have liked them.<\/p>\n

I remember Mom being excited about moving back to Tampa and getting her own house for the first time.\u00a0 She found a really neat little cedar house in a quiet neighborhood just off I-4 and 41.\u00a0 It was close to where she’d be working at the V.A. Hospital, and close to her parents as well.<\/p>\n

Shortly after she moved to Tampa, she met Rafael Perez, 16 years her junior, who adored her completely.\u00a0 She and Felito married a couple of years later and had a great relationship.\u00a0 It was nice to see her so happy.<\/p>\n

Mom died on April 8, 1996, of her first heart attack.\u00a0 It could not have come at a better time: no one was expecting it, so there was no stress or worry about it ahead of time.\u00a0 I was days away from leaving on a cross country trip to California.\u00a0 The trip turned out to be a real blessing, as it turned into an eight month stay, doing new and exciting things.\u00a0 It was a very healing time.<\/p>\n

Here\u2019s a poem my mom faxed me a few weeks before she passed, author Unknown.\u00a0 She’d fax me goofy cartoons all the time, but this was the first and only time she sent something like this.<\/p>\n

If you could see where I have gone
\nthe beauty of this place,
\nand how it feels to know you\u2019re home
\nto see the Savior\u2019s face.
\nTo wake in peace and know no fear
\njust joy beyond compare,
\nwhile still on Earth you miss me yet,
\nyou wouldn\u2019t want me there,
\nif you could see where I have gone.<\/span><\/p>\n

If you could see where I have gone,
\nhad made the trip with me,
\nyou\u2019d know I didn\u2019t go alone
\nthe Savior came with me.
\nWhen I awoke, He was by my side
\nand reached down His hand
\nHe said \u201cHurry now, you\u2019re going Home,
\nto a grand and glorious land,
\ndon\u2019t worry over those you love,
\nfor I\u2019m not just with you,
\nand don\u2019t you know with you at Home
\nthey\u2019ll long to be here, too?\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

If you could see where I have gone
\nand see what I\u2019ve been shown
\nYou\u2019d never know another fear
\nor ever feel alone.
\nYou\u2019d marvel at the care of God
\nHis hand on every life.
\nAnd realize that He really cares
\nand bears with us each strife,
\nand that He weeps when one is lost
\nHis heart is filled with pain;
\nbut oh, the joy when one comes Home
\nA child is Home again.<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>

Mom 1968 in one of our tops<\/p><\/div>\n

If you could see where I have gone,
\ncould stay awhile with me;
\ncould share the things that God has made
\nto grace eternity.
\nBut no, you couldn\u2019t ever leave
\nonce Heaven\u2019s joy you\u2019ve known,
\nyou couldn\u2019t bear to walk Earth\u2019s paths
\nonce Heaven was your Home.<\/p>\n

If you could see where I have gone
\nyou\u2019d know we\u2019ll meet someday
\nAnd though I\u2019m parted from you now
\nthat I am just away.
\nAnd now that I\u2019m Home with Him,
\nsecure in every way,
\nI\u2019m waiting here at Heaven\u2019s door
\nto greet you some sweet day.<\/span><\/p>\n

Mom faxxed that to me just a couple of weeks before she died.<\/p>\n

She knew it would comfort me immediately and for years to come.<\/p>\n

Happy birthday Mom, happy mother’s day!<\/p>\n

RELATED:\u00a0I remember Momma 2011<\/a>
\nI remember Momma 2010
\n<\/a>A Friend and I Talk About Dying and Easy Transitions<\/a>
\nThe End of Death As We Know it\u00a0 \u2013 What The Crossing Over Experience\u00a0<\/a>
\nWas Like, As Reported By Those Who Made The Transition<\/a><\/p>\n

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