Each evening around an hour before sunset, I go into my yard to hand water the plants. \u00a0I keep 3 hoses hooked together and it reaches all the way around the house. Lately the hose keeps getting kinked and the nightly ritual has now become me hauling big lengths of hose around and Jeremy walking behind, untangling and unkinking the hose. \u00a0The first time it happened, he asked, “you’ve got three outside spigots with hoses, why use one?” \u00a0I told him it was\u00a0so I can water everything with one hose.\u00a0\u00a0He remarked that I was causing more hassle for myself by being locked into my perception of what I wanted and why I wanted it. \u00a0That’s why I keep him around: he’s such a mirror. \u00a0He throws my words back at me. \u00a0I’m used to throwing, but not so used to catching. \u00a0I have a lot to learn.<\/p>\n
He was right. \u00a0Once I took a moment to think about it, I was<\/em> creating more work for myself. \u00a0It was a routine I was used to, though, and I kept doing it since it felt familiar to me. \u00a0It had become a rut that was no longer serving my best interests, nor my new intention in the Now.<\/p>\n My new intention in the Now is that I want to be able to water every spot in the yard with a hose that is easy to carry and move around. \u00a0 I’d gotten in the habit of one-hose years ago, when I did a lot of night time watering. \u00a0Back then, there were no lights in the west and east sides of the house, so I’d have to walk into deep darkness to turn them off and the dark scared me. \u00a0At the time, \u00a0I’d just moved up from Miami and hadn’t known too much outside darkness ever, so it took some getting used to.<\/p>\n So, I thought, since then, due to a 20+ year old fear that was no longer even relevant, I’ve been hauling around heavy lengths of hose, spending as much time untangling as I do watering, and not even noticing that was what it had turned into. \u00a0I wonder what other areas of my life I do the same thing with. \u00a0What other areas I might be limiting myself by my perception of what I am doing and what I think I should be doing.<\/p>\n <\/p>\n <\/p>\n