An excellent article here with good suggestions. Living in an atmosphere of anger will suck the life from you. It’s disrespect at its most basic. To live being afraid of triggering someone’s anger, not knowing which personality will wake up, is a hell on earth. And to keep your kids in that atmosphere for any reason is unconscionable.  Here are ways to break the pattern:

The Downside of Anger By Hara Estroff Marano
A strong emotion that is accompanied by arousal of the nervous system, anger produces effects throughout the body. But if you express it, you’re not necessarily better off.  Funny thing about anger. As emotions go it’s often pretty clear-cut. It’s rarely subtle.  But is there an emotion that is more misunderstood? Many believe that holding anger in is bad for you, that it only builds pressure to be expressed. In fact, sudden bursts of anger or prolonged anger are bad for you. A strong emotion that is accompanied by arousal of the nervous system, anger produces effects throughout the body. It eats away at your cardiovascular system, your gut and hijacks nervous system, often obliterating the capacity for clear thinking. And it may even grow in intensity.  Continue reading →

I forgot I had my big puffy hugger pillows on the living room couch and when I went in to bed at midnight, I was too sleepy to walk back out and get them. I slept with one flat head pillow and one small throw pillow as an arm hugger. I awoke all crinked up. Oh, how I appreciate my pillows so much more today!