Horizons Magazine
MARCH 2003
The effect of our words on others, my life is my message,
showering off the day, rejoicing in the midst of God's will.
Hello and welcome to the March 2003 issue of Horizons Magazine. First of all,
I noticed that in my February editorial last month, I ended page 28 with a complete
sentence, and the editorial was continued on page 33. However, I dropped off the
beginning of the paragraph on page 33 (which should have read, "Ah, lemme
introduce you to my posse. There's Little Kitty, the 17 year old elder, a beautiful slim marmalade with white tips and tail.") Then I went on to tell about my entire fur family. Although it was only the first 9 words that dropped off, you probably wondered what was missing.
It's interesting how meanings can change with just the addition or subtraction of a few words. How just a few extra words can bring a person to clarity, and how suppressing a few words at the right moment can save a relationship. How helpful it can be to express things like appreciation and enthusiasm, and suppress things like criticism and unsolicited advice. How you can brighten someone's day with just 3 little words ("I love you,") and shatter someone's dream with only one ("No.")
The words we casually speak can have a profound effect on those who hear them. A few flippant remarks can wound for a lifetime. A word of appreciation can sustain for just as long. I had a good reminder of this last month.
Last month I refused an ad from my friend Edward, who'd recently gone into business with a mutual acquaintance, SG. SG was someone I'd had occasion to do business with within the last 12 months and during contract negotiations, he evidenced lack of integrity with flagrant intent to do so. We'd come to a verbal agreement in a lease/purchase of real estate I owned.
In preparing the contract, not only did it not constitute a legal document, it essentially had me paying part of the mortgage payments for a year while SG lived there, after which I'd turn over to him the property for less than 1/5th of its value. He frequently invests in real estate, so when I saw the agreement, I assumed he'd gotten me confused with another seller on another parcel. When I pointed out to him that the terms were not as we'd discussed, and that I'd like to detail in plain language exactly what we'd agreed to, he said only, "I gave you my best offer." When I pointed out that the contract left out language that was required by law, and essentially had me turning the property over to him while remaining bound to pay for it myself, he said only, "I gave you my best offer." As to the standard legal form for lease/purchase that I sent him, he said only, "I gave you my best offer." All this took place within 2 days and a day after that, I put it out of my mind and thought no more about it.
When my friend Edward asked to place the ad, I told him he could do so, and that I could not in good conscience have SG's name in the magazine. Caroline Myss talks about conscience on page 9 this month. Edward had been privy to the prior transaction with SG, so this was no surprise to him. I thought the matter was dropped, then a week later I had lunch with Edward's daughter and she brought up SG's name. I mentioned my experience and we moved onto other topics. Another week passed and I called Edward's daughter about another matter, only to find out that the entire week she'd stewed over the situation, and even gotten her father and his wife and SG and his wife all in an uproar about it. I was surprised since we all study the same principles of law of attraction. I take responsibility for attracting the situation in the first place but, being an isolated incident, I moved on as soon as it was over.
Abraham-Hicks says it best on page 8 this month: "When you start thinking about what somebody else thinks, and forming a judgment about what they're thinking - now you're thinking, and now you've introduced resistance." Edward's daughter felt the need to pick at it in her mind like a scab until it was huge and bleeding and other people were involved, and then she suggested I take steps to bandage it. All this at a time when she's going through many personal issues of her own (aren't we all?) so I did not get upset at what she said to me. That's just part of who she is and how she does things, and if I am who I say I am, then I either love her unconditionally or I don't. I realize that I'm not in this lesson alone, and it's not my job to point out what her lesson might be.
Sometimes I have a story I want to tell, however if I'm telling my story, I'm also telling the story of everyone else involved. Whatever story I tell comes from my perspective of what I experienced. I have lots of (really great!) stories that can't be told without risking stepping on the toes of someone who isn't ready for it to be told quite yet. At least not told from my vantage point. I figure my life is an open book, I have very few secrets and have learned that my life is indeed my message... and there's no telling who might be watching! So I live with doors, windows and heart wide open and do the best I can with whatever is presented before me day by day.
This afternoon I had something delightful appear before me and I got the chance to take a shower in the afternoon rain. Seeing the sudden downpour, I jumped outa my dress, grabbed the Ivory soap and ran out into the backyard *yes, it's private* and had the most refreshing shower! Although the temperature reached 80 today, the rain was quite chilly and felt great. I love taking showers and use them often to change consciousness. After a day's work, I'll shower the day off me. After challenging events, I'll wash the worries away. Putting my face under the shower and letting the water pour over me, it's easy to visualize all my troubles and concerns going down the drain, and a sparkling new Me! appears as though newly born... a fresh slate... every moment a new beginning.
Speaking of new beginnings, it's not always easy to imagine a new beginning when every day you're bombarded with the media's version of what's going on in the world, and the government is taking every opportunity to keep us feeling threatened and on the brink of war. The fact that there is more peace in the world than there is conflict has never been mentioned in the news. The fact that great strides are being made toward conflict resolution never makes the headlines. Although scientific studies have been made showing the corelation between prayer and peace, and the fact that (a la the hundredth monkey) the people of our world are becoming more conscious and there is much progress in all areas of healing conflict, you'll seldom hear anything like that in the popular media. During this time, and during all times of challenge and conflict, it behooves us to remember: If we're in the midst of God's Will, how can we not rejoice?
We appreciate you.